0100-Drawing Expectation
by Chronic Guardian
Summary: Everyone had an expectation for his life, it seemed. But when the world expects everything of a child, sometimes it has to be content with baby steps. [Twelve Shots of Summer: Hexa-Code Kernel]


**0100-Drawing Expectation**

By Chronic Guardian

**Written for Twelve Shots of Summer: Hexa-Code Kernel, Week 4: Draw()**

For Noctis, the word "Destiny" always had a funny sort of weight to it. It went down sweet like cake but then sat in his stomach like a rock. It was exciting and terrifying, beautiful and dreadful at the same time. Ever since Luna told him his part in the grand scheme, it was like the moon had lifted him up into the night sky to share a cosmic secret as the stars around them burned and fell.

And then, as life went on, he realized it wasn't a secret. Everyone knew, everyone _expected_, and everyone seemed pretty eager to just get on with the whole thing and have him save the world already.

Unfortunately for them, Noctis hadn't quite grown into his destiny just yet. He probably would eventually, but at eight years old he was still more kid than king. And that frustrated people. It frustrated his bodyguard and teachers and tutors that he wasn't born perfect. Some of them were better at keeping it to themselves, but he could still tell from the looks in their eyes or the strained patience in their voices that they had all expected better from a boy gifted with so grand a destiny.

But Noctis was still human, so they would have to wait.

In the meantime, he gravitated towards those who could accept him as he was. And that was part of what he liked about Luna: She knew better than anybody how important his destiny was, but she didn't treat him like a failed demigod for not instantly living up to it. She understood what it was like to have a big future and have people expect things out of you.

Maybe that was why, out of all the people expecting something from him, he was afraid of disappointing her the most.

Noctis sighed at the two pieces of paper in his hands before giving his unfinished reply a measuring squint. Most of the time, the letters were no problem. He'd told Luna he wasn't great at what Ignis collectively called "composition", so she'd suggested short replies. Noctis liked that, he liked writing exactly what was on his mind without having to stretch it out to hit a word count. He didn't have to say too much and Luna always got him anyway.

But this time was kind of different. This time, she asked for something back. She had sent him a sketch she did, a picture of some of the flowers in Tenebrae, and then asked him for one of his own drawings in return. And because Luna never asked for anything, he was determined to do it right.

...Which would probably be a lot easier if he'd actually tried drawing before now.

Not to say he'd never put pencil to paper—Ignis could certainly attest to as much—But even the best Justice Monsters doodles he'd done on the margins of his homework wouldn't be good enough for something like this. This was for Luna, and the picture she'd sent looked almost real. Sending something less than that seemed kind of insulting.

Unfortunately, given his skill level, it was looking like "insulting" might be the most realistic expectation in this case.

Putting down the letter, Noctis shook his head and lifted his pencil again. No excuses. If he was doing this for Luna then he was doing it, period. She'd given him enough grace in the past, now it was his turn to prove that he hadn't wasted it, that he really had grown.

Looking over again to see how she did her lines, he gave a determined nod and started again. Hers were graceful and smooth; his were thick and clumsy, and way too dark, but thinking about it like that made him press the pencil in even harder and that just made things worse.

Still, he didn't give up until he at least had an outline to work with.

It wasn't much. Noctis appraised it with a resigned expression and tried to figure out what he was doing wrong. The picture was supposed to be of an old Carbuncle toy he used to keep under his pillow, but the current sketch looked closer to a surprised Flan. Would it look any better once he started adding details? Or maybe the trick was in the shading…

"Having trouble, Highness?"  
Noctis twitched at his attendant's voice, sending a great black mark straight across the drawing. Sometimes he had to wonder if surprises like this really were just an ongoing series of coincidences rather than Ignis trying to sneak up on him when he wasn't doing homework.

Twisting around in his chair, he gave a flat inquiring look. "Yeah?"

Ignis paused a moment, as if to let Noctis rethink whether or not he really wanted to wave off professional help, before quietly accepting his liege's stubbornness and moving on to business. "Another letter came for you," he said, holding up an envelope. Noctis could just make out a Tenebraen postmark in the upper right corner. "Has our lady decided longer messages are in order?"

Noctis frowned. Not that _he_ knew of.

It felt silly to say so, but he kind of hoped it wasn't the case. Of course Luna _could_ write something longer, or push harder, or probably even draw better than what she'd sent him. She took her destiny seriously and matched every expectation it threw at her. The fact that she would put all that aside and just meet him where he was at… well, it almost felt like a dream just waiting to be broken.

"...Perhaps it's something else, then," Ignis continued, placing the envelope down on Noct's desk. "I suppose I have been wrong on occasion."

No occasion that Noctis could remember, but it was a gracious allowance on his attendant's part, so he let it stand.

"By the way, Highness, about your homework..."

Noctis pressed his lips together and tried not to get impatient. "Mmm?"

"Well, it's not that I mind correcting it—"

"I'll deal with it in a minute. Thanks."

Ignis sighed, but still bowed. "...Of course."

For a second there was silence and nothing happened. Noctis could feel something in the air—another expectation—but he wasn't sure exactly what for. An apology? An explanation? With Ignis, it was hard to tell how much was personal and how much was "just business".

Before he could sort it out all the way, his attendant cleared his throat and left.

Deciding to deal with it later, Noctis put down his pencil and went about opening the new arrival. Maybe it was a longer reply like what Ignis thought. Or maybe Luna had forgotten something? It didn't seem like something she'd do, and Noctis felt weird even considering the possibility, but the address _was_ in her handwriting.

Maybe it was an apology.

Noctis squirmed in his seat. It was just the sort of thing she would do, apologizing for trusting him with too much too fast, apologizing that he wasn't good enough yet. She would say it nicely, of course, but he hated that she would have to say it at all.

Setting his lip in a determined frown, he gave the envelope a serious look. Maybe he couldn't magically get better overnight, but someday he would make it so she wouldn't have to hold back. Somehow he would grow into the destiny they shared.

He finished tearing the top of the envelope and reached inside. Immediately, his frown shifted to a grimace and he instinctively looked away. It was stuffed. So maybe Ignis was right, then. Maybe Luna was tired of short letters.

_Better than an apology_, he reminded himself. Luna knew how to get to the point in a single sentence. She wouldn't need a bunch of pages just for that.

Taking a bracing breath, he unloaded the contents onto his desk, counted to five, then made himself look. If nothing else, he at least owed Luna that much.

He froze. Strewn across his desk were a series of drawings like the one she'd already sent, except these ones weren't as...well, _good_.

That wasn't to say they were bad—they still blew his half-baked outline out of the water—but he could still see a progression in the set. Some were too dark, some had blurred lines, and some even looked downright malformed.

But each one got better, and each one had Luna's signature in the corner.

Finding a new note amidst the sketches Noctis picked it out and squinted at the words.

_Sorry for sending two letters before you can answer either_, it read. _May the record of my mistakes aid your own attempts. _

Noctis lowered the note, looked at the sketches, then looked back at his own drawing. The lines were darker and harder than they should have been, but that didn't mean it was a total loss. If he knew what he was doing wrong, then theoretically he was one step closer to being right.

Still, if he was going to be taking his time with this one, then it was probably a good idea to just send a reply now and worry about the picture when it was finished.

Or, rather, when he finished practicing.

Pulling out some stationary from his desk, he got to work.

=X=

Ignis had only just made it back to the study—looking to review the prince's homework chapters for when his highness _did_ feel like studying—when Noctis came in behind him.

"Hey," the prince said, sharp resolve putting a curt edge on his voice. "Are we doing that review lesson today?"

Ah, yes. Review. His Highness's least favorite part of his learning: the part that proved he hadn't absorbed it all the first time. Ignis nodded and silently hoped this conversation wasn't heading into another lecture on the importance of self-reflection. So far, the young crown prince had been less than receptive on the subject.

"Alright, let's get to it, then," Noctis announced with stern, eight-year old determination.

Ignis stopped, then narrowed his eyes, waiting for the other foot to drop.

"After that," his Highness went on, "could you show me how to draw?"

"Having trouble?"

Noctis frowned and shook his head. "No, no trouble. I'm just…" his determination seemed to peter out and trail off. "...still getting there, I guess."

"Oh? Similar to how we're still 'getting there' on your understanding of royal elemancy?"

"Yeah," the prince nodded. "Kind of like that."

Perhaps it was the lack of total armed resistance against the idea, but Ignis felt a pang of sympathy run through his heart. "It's a difficult subject, Highness," he said quietly. "I don't blame you if you don't get it all at once."

At that, the prince smiled. Not a huge smile, mind, but still something out of the ordinary.

"I'll get it eventually," he replied.

"You don't mind the work?"

"Well..." Noctis shrugged. "Nobody's perfect, right?"

Ignis paused. It was an odd statement coming out of Noctis, who idolized his father and greatly admired Lady Lunafreya. Of course, he probably didn't include them in the general 'Nobody' listing, but Ignis still felt it was an noteable change of character.

And yet, if it meant the boy was willing to improve…

Ignis gave a dry smile. "I'll keep my expectations in check then, Highness."

"Thanks." Maybe it's a trick of the light, but something about Noctis's smile looks genuine as he passes on his way to the desk. "Appreciate it."

=End=

**Author's Notes**:

So I've been wanting to write **Final Fantasy XV** for a while now and give it the kind of treatment I gave **Type-0** in my **Suzaku Memorium** collection, specifically in regards to the Noctis/Luna romance. In that regard, this is kind of like me testing the waters for the bigger project I have in mind: **Cosmis Love**, an exploration of the possible chemistry we're missing in the actual game. As with here, I feel it's probably based a lot on Noctis and Luna inhabiting similar isolationary roles that set them apart from other people through a huge burden of expectation, but that can only bring you so far, you know? Maybe someday I'll get around to actually exploring that thought, but for now I'm glad I at least got to do this one.

In the meantime, though, you can definitely check out the **Twelve Shots of Summer** forum and community for more reads and writing challenges this summer. Who knows? Maybe someone else will jump on the ultra-late-to-the-XV-party bandwagon with me and we can commiserate on could-have-beens together.

Until then, I hope this wasn't too sappy.

Thanks for dropping by!

-CG

[29-JUN-2019]


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